Hello Ladies, Gentlemen and Others

jakemorph:

pyroland:

pyroland:

this is a fucking grinch rental that we have at my job and I tried so hard to rent it out in december but his big ass kept scaring people 

Hrrnngh, Max, I’m trying to sneak around, but I’m dummy thick, and the clap from my ass cheeks keeps waking up the Whos

did you try making it face the customers instead of sitting against a wall with its ass right out

(via jenbarkly)

seedeaters:

im-a-fully-realized-creation:

war-lesbian:

beachgothgay:

The ides of March is coming up what’s everyone getting me?

i never understood how we’ve reinvented heiroglyphics until now

(via dontsolvethecrime-savethelife)

pussykraken:

my art peaked wen i was 4 or so and would just throw whatever shit i could find (juice, rainwater, plants, moss, shells, dirt, sugar, soap, rocks, milk, toys etc.) in2 a bucket n stir it with a wooden spoon 4 hours sitting in th garden n wen som1 would ask me wot th fuck i was doing i would b like “Potion”

(via hotboyproblems)

pussykraken:

my art peaked wen i was 4 or so and would just throw whatever shit i could find (juice, rainwater, plants, moss, shells, dirt, sugar, soap, rocks, milk, toys etc.) in2 a bucket n stir it with a wooden spoon 4 hours sitting in th garden n wen som1 would ask me wot th fuck i was doing i would b like “Potion”

(via hotboyproblems)

terrypratchettparadise:

“Most books on witchcraft will tell you that witches work naked. This is because most books on witchcraft were written by men.”

— Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman - Good Omens

(via literallyaflame)

bonerfart:

Me: my son is so tiny i must have the tiniest son in the world

Doctor: this is a regular sized baby, i don’t think you understand how babies work

Me: I love my tiny son

(via hotboyproblems)